LadyDeathMaggot

The end times are not really the END times.

“It is but the wiping out of a false start in order that the world may then begin. As when a man lies down to sleep, if he finds a twisted root under his shoulder he will change his place - and after that the real sleep begins. Or as a man setting foot on an island, may make a false step. He steadies himself and after that his journey begins. You would not call that steadying of himself a last thing? …yours is a failure to begin”

-Perelandra by C.S. Lewis

The end times are not the end, they are the steadying of the failure to begin correctly…then the true journey comes…

i need a job…

My stomach doesn’t like horseradish…

But it just wasn’t working for me. Good bye pretty sunset.

So I went to the Getty Center for the third time…it was just as amazing as the first. We went through the gardens again too. It was all too wonderful.

We went down with the Honors program at school. It ended up being Alejandra, Matt, Jonathan, Rebekah, and I. Dr. Anacker met us down there and Alejandra drove.

This is Alejandra. She is a pretty awesome lady! Her car has a GPS system that took us to the Getty which makes her even more awesome! And she wanted us to name it so now her GPS system is named Hal after the computer in 2001 Space Odyssey. He sounds kind of like him…our only fear is that he might try to kill us…

Here’s a typical picture of Matt and I. No surprise I guess…

The guys played chess on the way down there and throughout the entire trip by writing down each others moves and occasionally drawing a picture of the board. I think Jon won both games…as usual.

Matt wanted us to have our picture taken so here we are (minus Dr. Anacker who is taking the picture). It is a rather odd picture…but it suits us well.

When we got there we looked at paintings and sculptures and furniture and the like…and they have put up their sculpture garden which I was quite disappointed in. None the less, I got a good picture out of it.

So here is Matt in the sculpture garden. This is between two sheets of metal just standing there…it was the best piece. Like I said, I was disappointed.

We also toured the gardens…here’s an areal view. We waited till five to go outside so it was nice and cool and so beautiful. Unfortunately, not as much was blooming as last time but it as still pretty cool.

Pretty flowers…

Pretty blue flowers…

Pretty flower that looks like it might eat you…

And pretty artistic photograph of two different types of flowers.

God was pretty creative.

The Plague has struck the city of Oran and countless people have died. Dr. Rieux witnesses along with other Doctors and his Priest friend, Paneloux, a child, hour by hour, in agonizing pain and finaly dying with a wail in terrible pain and suffering.

Afterwards Paneloux and Rieux talk about it together:

Paneloux states: “’That sort of thing is revolting because it passes our human understanding. But perhaps we should love what we cannot understand’ Reiux straightened up slowly. He gazed at Paneloux, summoning to his gaze all the strength and fervor he could muster against his weariness. Then he shook his head. ‘No, Father. I’ve a very different idea of love. And until my dying day I shall refuse to love a scheme of things in which children are put to torture” (Camus 218).

How would you handle this situation. How do you explain evil if there is an all-good, all-powerful, all-knowing God? How do you comfort a Mother who has just lost her child? The problem of evil is probably one of the main reasons people refuse to believe in God. And it seems they have good reason. Is Paneloux right is an assumption that some things we just cannot know? Do you dare say to a Mother that her child suffered and died for a greater good? Since when does the ends justify the means? Since when does the bigger picture explain the smaller?

Within apologetics, this is a serious problem. It is a serious problem that Christians must deal with. Camus refused to believe in God for this reason, thus why he wrote The Plague. How do YOU explain the problem of evil? What would you say to Camus if you had the opportunity?

Last night I found a really cool lump on my back right on top of my spine.

I have to say that is was a pretty cool lump although I wasn’t exactly sure what it was

It was probably about 1.5 inches wide and long. And it was all porey, like my skin was being stretched out so my pores got all big. It didn’t itch nor did it hurt.

I was quite excited about it. I thought for sure I was going to die of some unknown disease and the whole school was gonna catch it from me and there would be a huge epidemic and everyone would have to be quarintined and school would be canceled and and then I wouldn’t have to worry about finals and life would just really be peachy-keen (well except for the fact that I died from some unknown disease).

But then it went away.

i’m sick…pity me, Oh pity me.

I have been reading Richard J. Fosters book Celebration on Discipline and it has been quite rewarding. He goes through a different discipline in each chapter. Chapter one is on Meditations. I figured it would be useless to simply read this book without putting things into practice so I decided to spend a month on each chapter (Due to my lack of discipline is looks like it will be much longer than that). So I have been practicing meditation and it has been very beneficial. To just think about one single passage has been very helpful in my spiritual growth. Often times we do Bible Studies and we read a chapter or more and we see really profound verses that could help us in our live so we underline them and move on. Usually we don’t see that verse for but a few seconds and then we forget what is said and we certainly don’t try to implement what it told us to do or not do. Meditation really helps in this area. Not only do you read the verse over and over trying to understand what it means but you also think on it in an applicable sense. So for instance take “Love is patient” in 1 Corinthians 13. Questions you would ask yourself in mediating on this verse would be such as “What is patience?”, “How specifically am I failing as a patient person?”, “How could I do better?”, “Are there people in my life (or specific situations) that I have trouble being patient with?”, “What can I do to be patient in these situations?”
No longer am I simply reading a string of amazing phrases about love such as “Love is patient, love is kind, love does not seek its own”, but rather I am not only taking a single verse but a single phrase and trying to see how this one phrase can affect me. It is also asking God for His help, guidance, comfort, and strength in these particular situations. No longer are the virtues something abstract that I can never be good at, they are something I can practically practice in my daily life.

Unfortunately, it is still hard to set aside time to meditate (Time usually flies and so far I have never spent less than an hour doing so) and it is hard to remember the things I have meditated on throughout the day. But I have also found that these are the most rewarding times I have spent with God.

On a side note, there is good article on Meditation online. I have been sticking very closely to this. To help me meditate I also have a journal and I typically sing a hymn of praise softly at the close. I feel that I can truly praise God in this way because I have seen and felt the direct change He is gradually making in my life.

So let this be an encouragement to you. Strive to spend time with God in this way. It has rewarded me. It will likely be rewarding for you as well.

I don’t really care what happens to my body when I am dead…so long as I am not cremated. I ‘m not sure I have faith that  God would be able to find all my ashes when my body is taken up with Him at the rapture…plus it would be really freaky to watch millions of pieces scattered far and wide coming back together. eck